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Monday, July 03, 2006

Tractor Trash and Cannibals

Some of life's most valuable lessons are learned the hard way. No rocket science in that statement. But sometimes hard learned lessons don't offer much value at all. Like shopping for titles in an airport bookstore. No matter how many times I am disappointed by my choices I still turn up minutes before departure, make a snatch and grab purchase, and regret it the following week. The biggest problem is usually those damn top-ten bestseller fiction lists. Who buys those books?? Is it a similar phenomena to why truly brainless and predictable blockbuster films attract such massive audiences? Recently it was my great misfortune to pick up copies of A Short History of Tractors in Ukrainian by Marina Lewycka and The People's Act of Love by James Meek. Here's a brief synopsis so you don't make the same mistake.

  • A Short History of Tractors in Ukrainian is inexplicably supposed to be a funny book. That's why I bought it for a bit of light summer fare. Well if you think eastern-Europeans-trying-to-speak-english and asides on the flippy-floppy organs of old men are funny this is your book. It reads like a first novel in the sense of a weekly suburban meeting of amateur sparetime authors and less like a candidate for major literary awards. Tentative explorations into identity and gender are cliche and uninspired. I won't even bore you with the plot. The only problem is that after selling millions of copies we might have to brace
  • The People's Act of Love is one of those strange books that should have been a movie first. It has all the elements of a terrific action-adventure big screen lollapalooza. Guardian journalist Meek has a real knack for translating words into visual imagination and the story ambles on convincingly enough. A critical plot device is the strategy of a Siberian prisoner to bring along a fellow prisoner on an escape plan so he can eat him when he runs out of food. Another is how a group of voluntary eunuchs relate to Czech soldiers led by a madman stationed in their town. There is plenty of romance, some sex, wars, escapes planned and foiled, magic, swordfights, children in distress, communists, czars, princes, revolutionaries, heroes and heroines. It's not that I didn't like this book it is just that I wasn't turning the pages with angst or hope. Like watching a blockbuster when introduced to the characters you could guess their fate. Coming soon to a Cineplex Odeon near you.
  • ourselves for the release of The Long History of Tractors in Ukrainian sometime next year. If so I suggest we add reading this book to the banned list of human rights anti-torture laws emerging in the world courts.

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